Newsletter

The Eighth Step

Posted on July 27, 2026, tagged as

“Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.” 

We have arrived at another decision point on the heroic journey of recovery. We have quit drinking, drugging, gambling, or whatever, placed ourselves under the guidance of the twelve-step program, and are working our way towards deciding to carry our self-improvement project further.  We are told that the next step of our healing journey involves setting things right with others, with people whom we have deceived, cheated, neglected, abused, or harmed in a myriad of ways. Nobody wants to endure the shame, fear, or embarrassment that such a process will engender. On the heroic journey of recovery, we once again must deal with our reluctance to continue with the task. We find the courage to continue through having discussions with our sponsor and others who have already completed this step. We may also have benefited through hearing the stories of others who share their experiences at meetings, and through reading some of the stories in the back of the Big Book. They all assure us that upon completion of steps eight and nine they experienced a great sense of relief. At this point no amends must be made (although as a practical matter, many amends have already been made.)

It is significant that there are two actions in this step. First, the making of a list, and second, becoming willing to make amends. At no point on our journey are we asked to do anything that we have not prepared ourselves to do. Also, thus far, even though the process has seemed intimidating, we have succeeded every step of the way. The eighth step should be no different. There is a Biblical story that I mention briefly in the accompanying blog. It is the story of the reconciliation of Jacob and Esau. I don’t mention it here to emphasize the importance of the Bible. For some the Bible is significant to their understanding of life, and to others it is not. But it is certainly a grand collection of impactful stories from which we can learn a lot about people and about ourselves. In the context of step eight, we are at another threshold, and like Jacob, it’s time to find the willingness to cross the river and face Esau.